Lifestyle
12 Things a Postpartum Mama Really Needs (and She May Not Even Know It)
So, how can we help our fellow new mama friends? Before I became a mother, I would excitedly show up at a new mom’s home with the cute baby layette and matching stuffed animal and want to snuggle and spend time with the new baby, give my friend a congratulatory hug, and go on my merry way — and all with the best intentions. Now, don’t get me wrong, as a new mom I greatly cherished all the thoughtful visits and gifts I received. But I have found that acts of service can be incredibly helpful during the postpartum healing process — and SO deeply appreciated. My recommendation is: Ditch traditional, keep it practical.
What Mom Really Wants for Mother’s Day
Oh, and the one traditional gift that never gets old for Mom? Breakfast in bed. Better yet, you can delay the breakfast part, and just let her stay in bed, asleep, under the covers, for as long as she wants. If you really want to be an overachiever, you could try sleeping through the night (so she can too). That will win you bragging rights and possibly even favorite child status for a week or two. Throw a couple eggs and some toast that you haven’t licked on top and you’re set for a month.
To My “Mom Village”
Moms who don’t think twice when I ask to use them as an emergency contact (and then dutifully show up to pick up my sick kid when the school nurse calls).
To Gray or Not to Gray
But one thing that’s not so great about 40 is gray hair. Unless you’re blessed with fantastic genes or beautiful blonde hair (where a gray might just politely disappear into the shiny yellow), you may also find yourself in this situation one day. I, too, was once a blonde (ahem, when I was 3) but my hair has grown progressively darker over the years so that it’s close to black today. And boy, do grays show up in close-to-black hair. My hairline is suddenly a serious ‘50 shades of gray’ situation, and not the sexy kind.
Our Family Doesn’t Go to Museums Together, and This Is Why
I’ve distanced myself from my arts-inspired, pre-motherhood life, and I’ve readjusted my mindset about how my son can enjoy art. I would love for my son to appreciate the finer qualities of a Rembrandt drawing, but I will accept his appreciation for drawing with crayons. I’d rather my son pound his fists on his plastic keyboard than our friend’s grand piano. He is still learning to be creative by exploring the possibilities of three-dimensional space with Play-Doh; he doesn’t have to contemplate a Rodin sculpture.
Raising Confident Girls (and Boosting Our Own Confidence)
We are so hard on ourselves, as women, and we hold ourselves to standards none of us can achieve. When was the last time you looked at yourself in the mirror and thought you were beautiful or had belief in your abilities? In the world of social media, we tend to have a skewed perspective. Everyone’s life seems perfect, and everyone looks beautiful under the veil of an Instagram filter. If we are judging ourselves harshly, our daughters will do the same. We need to be kinder to ourselves, so they know how to be kind to themselves too.
Tips and Tricks for Managing the Large (or Busy) Family
As soon as I became pregnant with number four, we gave in to the call of the minivan, started looking for a bigger house, and began researching large families. I knew I was going to have to uncover some secrets and learn the ropes of managing our new, larger family. While I haven’t quite found or mastered all the tricks, here are a few I’ve come to rely on.
The Runaway Mother (and the Need for Self-Care)
After that first run, I pulled aside my 3-year-old and told her Mommy needs her to be a good girl for Daddy when Mommy leaves the house. I also explained to my husband that I was sorry she was so difficult but that the prospect of not being able to enjoy some much-needed self-care was daunting.
Infertility to Adoption :: A Fight for a Family
After three years of infertility treatments that included IVF and surgery to help them conceive, the final answer was unbearable. No. No, they would not have a child together.
