My journey to parenthood is not significantly different than many women. I was 35 years old. I had recently been diagnosed with Crohn’s disease and went into remission after figuring out the right medication. But something was missing from my life.

Not something. Someone. And so I began what ended up being a multi-year journey to become a parent.

I worked with many doctors. Doctors who treated me officially, and doctors who were my friends. Doctors who held my hand, and doctors who answered all my questions. Along the way, I suffered a miscarriage and an ectopic pregnancy before finding success with IVF.

I like to say I tried to have every obstetric experience. While each experience was painful, I knew that for a woman in her late 30s, they weren’t necessarily abnormal. What was slightly abnormal was that unlike many women who suffer through this process, I was doing it by myself.

I am a single mother by choice.

Though it’s not quite accurate to say I became a mom by myself. I did it with support and help from many people — and eventually, it was only possible because of my medical team. I did it with the love and care from my family. And I did it with the very hands-on involvement of my community — my village. My chosen family stepped in and helped me through the pain, both physical and emotional. They took me to appointments so I wouldn’t be alone. They cried and laughed with me. And so, after every setback, with the help of everyone around me I picked myself up, put one foot in front of the other, and tried again.

And then, as the final pregnancy progressed, my community said, “We are here for you. We will help you, feed you, and be with you. We will pass on our baby clothes, toys, and anything else you might need. We will help you run errands and we will sit with you at home.”

So yes, I chose to become a single parent. And yes, the path to motherhood wasn’t straight. And yes, at the end of the day, I’m a single mother, home alone taking care of my child.

But truly? I’m not alone at all. My blood family is at the other end of FaceTime whenever we want to see them. My local chosen family is in the neighborhood. And when I need to connect more broadly, there’s always the phone, email, and social media to help me communicate with my network. All of these circles of people are in our lives daily, weekly, monthly, yearly. They are helping me raise my daughter.

Sarah is delighted to be the mother of 2-year-old Margalit Penina. By day she is the senior director of operations, planning, and analysis at Combined Jewish Philanthropies. When not working, she enjoys gardening with her daughter, taking loads of pictures, and cooking up a storm. She’s raising her daughter in Brookline, MA.